this is how this song ends;
a dead deer lying in the road makes me swerve and lose control
and i careen right off a bridge into the river.
but i hope that no one lets you know...
i heard you moved to Oklahoma, chose to stay after you saw the first snowfall.
was it gorgeous? did it make the war seem worth it?
did it remind you of some greater purpose you'd forgot?
with my chest wrapped around the engine block,
i have the faintest final thought of my best friend
and how long it's been since we've even talked.
maybe we shouldn't talk.

i know i won't know what i want until i'm dead and gone,
so i'll take hammers to my habits up against these walls and break out.
shouldn't need your voice of reason to remind me that a sober head alone
is not enough to keep me from that hazy glow i slave out for.
does my name still leave a sour aftertaste in your mouth?
you've got your halo from the crown, and mine is buried in the lost and found.
wish i didn't have to crash this car to figure out what i need right now.

that's the sound of the last train home.
my body sloshes down in the cold station seat.
I can hear October whistling through my widening cracks.
my neck, my brain, my knees, my knuckles and my back.
the things i carry and the things that i lack.
2 photos of my parents and the 2 i have of us.
one in front of a waterfall in the thawed out April sun,
and one in your car in a downpour
on your knees facing backwards in the passenger, smiling,
staring in my eyes in the perfect lighting,
we were so happy and in love that we'd been laughing & crying.
you were so glad to have found me then.

i know i won't know what i want until i'm dead and gone,
so i'll take hammers to my habits up against these walls and break out.
shouldn't need your voice of reason to remind me that a sober head alone
is not enough to keep me from that hazy glow i slave out for.
does my name still leave a sour aftertaste in your mouth?
you've got your halo from the crown, and mine is buried in the lost and found.
wish i didn't have to crash car to figure out what i need right now,
so what do i need right now?

somehow, someway, somewhere, someday, i will see you.
and there will be a different kind of light (a different kind of light in my eyes)
there is something in the way your voice can part me like a sea
that left my front door open wide in the middle of the night.
i was grasping into oceans all for anchors.
cut my fingers on their rust,
saw the sharks of your distrust begin to circle,
and charge the center all at once
i always knew that it would come.

this is how this song ends;
a dead deer lying in the road makes me swerve and lose control.